Monday, February 1, 2010

Second SAmple

Tomorrow I am scheduled to go the lab to give a "sample" and then meet with the doctor to discuss the results of my blood work as well as the comparison of results from each test. I am little nervous or maybe anxious. This might sound funny but I have mixed feelings about whether I want something to be wrong with me or not.

That might sound a little odd at first but hear me out. If something is wrong with me and he finds it then we know what the problem is, the search is over. At that point he will either have a treatment or he won't. We might not like the answer but we have it. If he finds that nothing is really too far out of the ordinary to inhibit my ability to procreate then the search continues. I think sometimes knowing is better than searching. Perhaps its because I find it easier to accept what "is" than "what could be".

It's neat how quickly they can get the results of the semen analysis. I do feel a little bad however as we are missing bits of work more frequently as we attend these appointments. My wife is an emotional roller coaster lately from what I believe is a mix of hormones and anxiety. We deal with things differently, that and I don't have a long enough attention span to focus on anything long enough.

What I would like to get out of this appointment that we didn't get out of the last is a sense where we are, and an idea what we need to do. I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

1 comment:

  1. that doesn't sound odd at all. My DH and I felt the same way when we went through our testing too. Good luck to you both! Hope you get the results and a positive pregnancy test quickly!